It's been almost a week into Ramadhan. I've always wanted to lead the family for prayers but for some reasons, getting everyone together all of a sudden just wasnt easy. But when Mama reiterated her desire to pray together, I realized that perhaps it's about time I tried once more. Perhaps in time, my siblings will be more receptive to the idea of praying in a congregation. Meanwhile, I don't mind being mama's imam. That's a start.
The day I put on my graduation gown finally arrived. I don't feel the excitement nor the need to celebrate. Loved seeing old friends though - friends whom I will miss. Wished I could hug and thank them for being such lovely friends but I have a problem expressing feelings. So I hugged and thanked them in my mind and hoped that somehow, they get that vibe. Studying felt like an obligation I needed to fulfill. I stuck to my job, completed it and now I'm slightly more than a month into my next obligation - work. I didn't see the need to be happy nor be proud of my achievement cause honestly, I do not feel as though I've done much. All I did was study.
Thankful I am to have been given the opportunity to have gone this far, alhamdulillah. I want to start thinking of ways and means to live a life that'll make a difference in someone else's life. Hope to start with Mama, and then the family and more.
Grandma was admitted to the hospital again. One could only pray that she gets well soon.
Graduation to me feels like a day to reflect and be thankful to all who's been involved in my life. My father, grandmother, mother, auntie, sister and my brothers as well as the friends whom I've met and made friends with all these years. My heartiest thanks.