Friday, February 29, 2008

"Mr Policeman, i need to go to the toilet."

I had no problem with that. Besides, better now then later when he meets his family. So we made a slight detour to the toilet. Once inside, he began
to close his eyes and the next thing i knew, he was gone. I knew im in deep trouble.

Somewhere in New York.....

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

I think it's sad to see kids grow up. When i was growing up, i do ask myself whether my parents realise that im no longer the little boy they once knew -- that ive passed that stage and should be treated differently.

And now I know how my brothers feel. They're sec 3 and are no longer the little twins that i once knew; I should not be treating them as if they were. No more hugs and kisses -- they're past that. And for some reason, i feel dissappointed.

Suddenly i realise how my parents might have felt when we were growing up. How sad they might have been to see us change. How hurt they might have been had we been rude or disrespectful. Looking back, my parents were justified for their actions. Back then, i was thinking otherwise. Of course parents have every right to do what they did. Especially when their kids grow up and end up having the mentality that their parents owe them a living.

My head is just a little messed up. I can never not have things to think about. I hope i can have my wirings settled before school starts.

Sunday, February 24, 2008

Wonderfully placed left-foot low shot that curled into the bottom right corner of the net.

To be honest, i was wondering why the keeper couldnt keep it out. So when the ball hit the back of the net, i was surprised.

Right now im thinking whether to accept 2 more P5 kids. As of today, my wednesday, thursday and friday nights are taken. So is my Saturday morning and afternoon. Should i choose to accept, it would mean i have to eat my monday and tuesday night as well as Saturday evening/ night and also part of my Sunday.

I would love to teach but would i be pushing myself too hard? Would i still be able to manage once school starts? I do need the funds to at least support my own expenses once i start school but would it be at the expense of my free time? I do want to watch Manchester United's game on weekends. I too wanna play weekend soccer with my secondary schoolmates. And it's the first time ive not visit my grandma in 3 weeks coz i simply cant find the time. And should i decide to learn driving, can i find a slot in my schedule?

Life is about making the right choices. Seizing opportunities as and when they arise. Life is also about making sacrifices. And right now, I'm unsure about what's the right choice and what's not, which i should sacrifice and which i should not.

And I realise that as u age, the things u have to decide on gets harder and harder.

Thursday, February 21, 2008

Lucky to have had the chance to have dinner at such a place. Had a taste of what it's like to enjoy the finer side of life - the atmosphere, that is. For out of the many things for me to choose from the buffet, i ended up with the usual - chicken, rice, some prawn, ice cream and chocolate cakes and that's it. Things like the cheesey creamy stuffs and the sushi fishey stuffs are just not my cup of tea. And i just cant shake the "i could have eaten a Beef Prosperity meal upsize, watched Jumper, play a game or two of bowling and buy 4 packets of nasi pattaya from Al-Ameen for my family and still have enough to buy 2 bottles of 1.5litres coke and a tub of ice cream for dessert" mentality.

A wonderful experience nonetheless.

Sometimes i wonder what kind of girl i'll end up if i continue to have such an unromantic mentality. Guess we'll just have to wait and see. Simply hope i dun havta wait too long.

The girl im teaching finally passed her maths. Her first test since i started teaching her a month ago. So glad when i heard the news from her mum. Such things make teaching worthwhile. But having to prepare my teaching materials and sacrificing my tv and playing time do make things hard.

Sometimes i feel that all kids can be brilliant. Some may need more help than others. Some simply need guidance. But the sad fact is that a majority of these kids arent getting the attention they need. And not all can afford a tutor. And subsidized tution by groups like Mendaki isnt tailored to suit the slow ones. This group will thus lag behind the pack and end up struggling with their studies throughout their school life. I wish for these kids to be given the required guidance.

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

i hate days that make me feel vulnerable.

I am affected when things dun go the way it should. I am well aware that things arent always status quo. I may be telling myself that i can handle change but somehow the frustration and irritation that i try to hide simply builds up to a stage where it can actually be seen. And yes, i am aware that this is where i need to learn to work under pressure, under different circumstances, last minute changes, and such. In any workplace, things will never be ideal. In order to fit in, u either adapt or u work some place else.

Of course when ur mind is in a chaotic state, little things can irritate and make things worst. This is where patience comes in. And i realised that trying to remain calm when ur mind is in a chaotic state is dangerous. It simply makes things worse for ur head.

Commitment isnt as easy as i initally thought. Once u commit ur self to something, u simply cannot afford to run away.

And now im sleepy. Perhaps some other day i'll continue.

Monday, February 18, 2008


This film is just superb. Arranged centers on the friendship between an Orthodox Jewish woman and a Muslim woman who meet as first-year teachers at a public school in Brooklyn. Over the course of the year they learn they share much in common - not least of which is that they are both going through the process of arranged marriages. No special effects, no digital imaging. Purely human emotions. A beautiful show.

Sunday, February 17, 2008

I don't see what anyone can see, in anyone else.....
But you.

(Not as great as i thought it would be after reading reviews about it. And in case ure wondering, Juno's the name of the girl.)

Saturday, February 16, 2008

The dribble

Didnt think i could cross or dribble the way i did. Of course it's the first and i hope it's the first of many. Still gotta work on my stamina.

Thursday, February 14, 2008

Nature vs Nurture

Ive had this belief: You are who you are because of the way u were raised -- how much time u see ur parents when ure a baby, how much time they interact with you, the way they interact with you, the relatives whom you play with, the way they interact with you, the kids u meet in school, how they interact with you, what you see and hear on tv, what u see and hear in school, what u see and hear on the internet, the friends around you, how they interact with you .........

In other words, your environment.

And i was talking to a friend of mind and she mentioned about some nature versus nurture debates -- which concerns the relative importance of an individual's innate qualities ("nature") versus personal experiences ("nurture") in determining or causing individual differences in physical and behavioral traits.Something about how a person's character could be due to genetics. Whether one is friendly, shy, selfish, fiery could very well depends on genetics.

When she said that, I realised that genetics play a part in human intelligence.

Attention-Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), or Hyperkinetic Disorder, is a neurobehavioural developmental disorder affecting about 5% of the world's population under the age of 19. It typically presents itself during childhood, and is characterized by a persistent pattern of inattention and/or hyperactivity, as well as forgetfulness, poor impulse control or impulsivity, and distractibility.

Dyslexia is a specific learning disability that manifests primarily as a difficulty with written language, particularly with reading and spelling. It is separate and distinct from reading difficulties resulting from other causes, such as a non-neurological deficiency with vision or hearing, or from poor or inadequate reading instruction.

Which means to say that genetics do play a part in a person's personality. Something that never crossed my mind before.

"Which, nature or nurture, contributes more to personality?"

Just one of those debates with no real ending.

But i was told that what is important is for parents to understand this "nature vs nurture" theory and to identify the traits/personality of their child and to nurture them appropriately. So if the child is quiet and shy by nature, one of the things parents could do is to engage the child in activities that will boost the child's self- confidence. Or if the child is stubborn, it could be due to the fact that he is born with it and parents should take nescessary steps to counter his or her stubborness while he or she is still at a young age before the child gets out of hand.

In other words, a balance between both nature and nurture. Something new i learned today which, although it's just the tip of the iceberg, would be useful for those us who aspire to start a family of our own one day.

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

Had an interesting conversation with a friend of mine over lunch.

My friend asked me which kind of girls i prefer. I told my friend i prefer nice girls. My friend gave me the "Who doesnt want a nice girl?" look and clarified, "Malays or Others?" ie to say, Chinese, Europeans, American, Korean- American, Malay- German, Malay- Dutch -- just not Malay. And im inferring Javanese-Malay, Malay-Boyanese, Boyanese-Javanese doesnt count as others.

It was an "either or" question but my answer was neither "either" nor "or". After much deliberation, i told my friend race is not a factor in determining my future wife or not-so-future girlfriend(s), if any. My friend proceeded to ask what would my mother say if i were to marry one that would fall under the "Others" category. To which i replied "I think she's ok with it. She seems ok when i joke to her about it. I don't think she would mind....."

In other words, i wasnt sure.

Those and other questions i hardly ask myself. But these are the questions i thought i clearly knew the answers. But when discussed aloud, the answers are clearly not as obvious as i previously thought.

What are ur criteria when deciding if someone's one of "the one"?
Religion first, looks second? Looks first, .......second and so on and so forth?

I told my friend that i never really thought about it as i may be thinking too idealistically where in fact, i should be more realistic. Coz i told my friend that i would noe it when i meet the person. But that said, I told my friend that though i cant say off hand what my criterias are, I believe the selection process have begun a long time back without me realising.

Personally, I find that someone who can engage you in conversations is someone whom u should take note of. And of course the conversation shouldnt be a one sided one.

Alright this would be as far as i would go, for now. The things i am thinking about when i'm 20. Wonder if in 10 year's time, would i be reading this alone or with someone else?

Saturday, February 9, 2008

Sharia law in UK is 'unavoidable'

Williams 'shocked' at Sharia row

Archbishop defends Sharia remarks

I'm a user of Firefox and my favourite part of this program is the "Latest Headlines" tab. I keep myself in touch with what's going on around the world by looking at the headlines shown, as well as my daily dose of Today newspaper. And the above 3 headlines made this past few days amused me.

I find it pleasant to see people of other faiths thinking. Dr Rowan Williams, the Archbishop of Caterbury certainly is one of them. By thinking, i mean remaining faithful to your faith but still keeping an open mind about other faiths. This instead of being stubborn and sticking blindly to religion and culture and tradition.

Dr Williams argues that adopting part of Islamic Sharia law would help maintain social cohesion. For example, Muslims could choose to have marital disputes or financial matters dealt with in a Sharia court. He says Muslims should not have to choose between "the stark alternatives of cultural loyalty or state loyalty".

And among the remarks he got are: "The Church at the moment, and the country, needs a clear lead. The country is itself in a debate about its own identity.", "The moral values that we pursue are ones that we need to know are clearly grounded, and it would be most helpful for the leader of the Church to be able to explain to people how the values we cherish stem from our Christian tradition."

And more painfully, "I think he is totally unfit for the role he undertakes. He's not fit to be Archbishop of Canterbury, he doesn't seem to know what his own business is, and he's not fit to sit in the House of lords. I think he should go."

It's nice to see people being passionate about their religion these days, for most of the times, u only see Muslims being a little too passionate about it. Here we have someone with an open mind trying to bridge the gap and there you have people hurling nasty remarks at him. Are they afraid that their Archbishop have been affected by one too many interfaith dialogues? Afraid that the integration of Sharia law and the UK legal system would mean the subtle infusion of Islam into the vastly Christian/Catholic society? To put it simply, no one would want to see their religious leader concede to the practice of another religion.

If only i could have my way with words so that i could put across my point clearly.

Having seen a rough picture of society there, I truly believe we are the only society where people of different races, languages, religions and even nationalities can live together as one.
Once in a while, a praise or two is good.
It helps to remind us that we're doing things right and that it's being recognised by others and that we should continue to do so.

Have a pleasant weekend!

Wednesday, February 6, 2008

Rubbish thoughts

Was watching Warkah Untuk Ibu and the first few minutes made me think. The fella was asking the girl what school she's in and what course she's doing and what not and he said something along the line of: If only he wasnt the sole bread winner of the family.... he would study all the way to the university.

It sounded like what i would tell myself back in those days where i was still didnt have a clear sense of direction. It sounded like a reasonable reason then but when i heard the words coming out from the actor, my first reaction was: RUBBISH! And that there's no reason not to pursue further education because of such a reason. And i hope my mother and i could come up with something to make sure me furthering my studies would be less of a burden.

In other news, the iron is making ironing an irritating workout. The ironboard will soon be 2 boards. The rice cooker is making the rice black. The water heater isnt making the water hot. And Ive yet to find time to buy rice coz shops are so packed these past few days due to the festive season. Shopping for groceries used to be a once a month affair but now, it becomes a chore. In short, managing a family is not easy.

Monday, February 4, 2008

The Kite Runner

Ive yet to read the book but if it is as good as what my friend had described it to be, then the movie isnt a good one.