Tuesday, October 20, 2009

When the going gets tough....

For some reason, despite my attempts to be positive and composed, I wrote on my Facebook wall that school suddenly feels like one big sick impossible game - and I'm hoping this feeling is temporal.

Tonight, I see my younger brothers decide what to wear for their job interview tomorrow despite their exams in the coming week. I see my sister buy me a fan to replace the noisy dying one in my room without me asking her for it. Tonight, I realize that we're all growing up and supporting one another in our own little ways. One of the things that Dad said before his leaving was how he knew we'd make our mother happy. I guess he knew before we even knew - and we're doing our best to prove him right, insyaallah.

Things like these, knowing that Mama will always be behind us as well as the little sweet distraction at the back of my mind are enough to make me want to continue playing the one big sick impossible game called school.

“O Allah, I hope for Your mercy, so give me not over to my self even for as little as a wink of an eye, and set right all my affairs, there is no god but You.”
Source: Abu Daw’ud

“O Allah, I seek refuge in Thee from incapacity, from sloth, from cowardice, from miserliness, decrepitude and from torment of the grave. O Allah, grant to my soul the sense of righteousness and purify it, for Thou art the Best Purifier thereof. Thou art the Protecting friend thereof, and Guardian thereof. O Allah, I seek refuge in Thee from the knowledge which does not benefit, from the heart that does not entertain the fear (of Allah), from the soul that does not feel contented and the supplication that is not responded.”
Source: Sahih Muslim, hadith 1260


cairo, lusaka, amsterdam said...

I LOVE the second hadith from Muslim. Masha'Allah.
I really hope things get better for you with school. What exactly are you studying and how much longer will it take? (Sorry, not sure where on the blog to find that).

marzuki said...

Thx. Things felt much much better after I wrote this entry. Im currently studying Civil Engineering. A little over 2.5 years more, insyaallah.

cairo, lusaka, amsterdam said...

Oh wow, masha'Allah! I can imagine it must be tough. But hang in there!

marzuki said...

Thanks (: