Saturday, December 26, 2009

Little things

He was holding 2 pieces of purple notes in his hands.

"Ive got $4 for lunch and dinner," he said to his unemployed twin brother. He must've known I'm within hearing distance. Cheeky.

"Awww," I said as I pulled out my wallet from the back pocket of my jeans. I had 2 pieces of red notes in my wallet. I took one out and gave it to him.

"Thanks!" He smiled.

"Where's my hug? Or at least just a kiss?" I teased him as he left for work.

Time flies.

I remember feeling extremely happy whenever my dad gave me money. Without me asking for it, he would somehow sense that I could use a little extra and would ask if I had enough. And despite me saying that I've enough, he'd dip his hand into the front pocket of the pair of jeans that he'd hang behind the door. And he'll give me whatever loose notes he could find. I've always wondered why he never kept his money in his wallet - notes and coins were always in his pockets.

It never mattered to me how much he gave. To receive something from him, on top of the usual allowance from mama, was enough to make my day. Imagine the number of nuggets I could buy for lunch with an additional $2!

Whenever I feel like I'm wearing his shoes, I'll think about him. And I wish he was still around. Sometimes I wish he was still around so that I could feel younger. Haha!

Dad, if you're reading this .... really, you're making me feel like I'm 52. Not saying you're old but I'm sure you know what I mean. I'm thinking things through alot more than I used to and it's all because of you. I really wish you're here right now coz there's a question that I'd like to ask you...

Suppose there's a girl that you met in school and you really like her even though you don't even know her. Dad, I've gotta tell you first that she's sucha beautiful girl and both you and I know that you're not the most handsome guy around. What would you do? You know, I was thiiiis close to talking to mama about this but somehow, I know she'll tell me to focus on my studies first. How I wish you were still around. You'll always be in my prayers.

Missing you, your son.


cairo, lusaka, amsterdam said...

I can imagine there are some things you really need your dad to talk to about. He sounds like he was an amazing person :)

adib said...

I THink our dads are the same. Cash in pockets. I wonder why too. nvr really asked. BUT maybe, let's just say the wallet is too small to keep their cash =)

marzuki said...

Hey Cairo,

Ure right. There are some things. But funny thing was, when he was around, there were many things I wished we could talk about but never did. Guess both of us let actions rather than words do the talking.

An amazing person nonetheless. Which by default makes me an amazing person to I guess. Haha!

marzuki said...


Maybe. Or maybe they're just not used to keeping their money in their wallets.

cairo, lusaka, amsterdam said...

Haha so you're amazing & phenomenal. Masha'Allah lol.

marzuki said...

Perhaps someday I'll be amazing AND phenomenal, insyaallah. For now, I think just phenomenal will do. LOL.

Ure far too generous with ur praises Cairo. My feets are currently a couple hundred metres above sea level. Trying my best though to bring myself back down to earth.

Anonymous said...

Your blog keeps getting better and better! Your older articles are not as good as newer ones you have a lot more creativity and originality now keep it up!

marzuki said...

Thanks Anonymous! Appreciate it!

I'm assuming you've been following my blog for quite some time to have seen and felt a change. You know, sometimes I do find myself improving as a writer as the days pass by.

I think I've finally realised that dreaming and waiting for things to happen isnt the way forward. I'm starting to see stories happening around me - at home, the mrt, in school. I also see stories waiting to happen and sometimes, just sometimes, I make them happen and then write about them.

I believe this recent realizations have helped me make my stories/entries original. Creativity wise, I'm still working on it.

Would love it if you leave a note from time to time whenever u drop by. Tell me what u like and what u dun like about a particular piece. And if you've got a blog of your own, do tell. I could leave a comment or two from time to time too! (: